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Funny Fantasy Baseball Names

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Winning your fantasy baseball league requires baseball knowledge, hard work and a lot of luck. Thinking of a funny name for your fantasy baseball team just requires a few moments of inspiration.

Funny fantasy baseball names typically involve one of the players on your team and a pun. Some funny fantasy baseball names are based on song or movie titles. (In 2013, we imagine there was a “Call Me Maybin” in every single fantasy baseball league.)

We’ve compiled a long list of what we think are the most funny fantasy baseball names of the last few years. We’ve also ranked our top five favorites from the group. Let us know if you agree or disagree and make sure to add your own funny fantasy baseball names in the comment section.

5. A Streetcar Named Cuddyer
When Tennessee Williams wrote a Streetcar Named Desire in 1947 he couldn’t have known that 66 years later Michael Cuddyer would win a batting title, thanks to the thin Colorado air, making Williams’ Pulitzer Prize winning drama relevant once again. Oddly, the play’s title would have made about the same amount of sense if Williams had gone with a Streetcar Named Cuddyer.


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4. Cano Soup For You
Anytime you can combine a great American show like Seinfeld and the great American pastime of baseball you should go with it. We can’t wait for agent Jay-Z to use this clever phrase when the Yankee’s refuse to give into his $200 million demands for Robinson Cano’s new contract. Cano Soup For You!

3. Don’t Ask Dotel
Octavio Dotel is so ancient he was actually in the minor leagues in 1994 when “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell,” the government’s then-official policy on gays in the military, went into effect. In 2011, the year ‘Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” was rescinded, Octavio helped the St.Louis Cardinals win the World Series. Coincidence? Almost certainly.


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2. He’s Just Not Shin Soo Choo
The influx of Asian players into Major League Baseball has allowed American fans to see such talents as Ichiro Suzuki and Yu Darvish. It’s also been a bonanza to fantasy baseball, as the exotic pronunciations of their names really lend themselves to funny team titles. Because, let’s face it, if you can’t do something good with a name like Shin Soo Choo you’re never going to have a clever team name. Still, you’d be hard pressed to ever top the nod to the romcom “He’s Just Not Shin Soo Choo.”

1. I’m Bringing Sexson Back
Ex-Boy Bander Justin Timberlake first brought SexyBack in 2006. Three-true outcomes slugger Richie Sexson retired from baseball after the 2008 season. And thus was born the greatest fantasy name of all time. And one that will work as long as Sexson remains retired, which means forever.


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Here are all the other names. We’re just hoping everybody who used Lucas Duda’s flexible name didn’t also draft the Mets’ mediocre outfielder.

Take Maholm Tonight
Angels in the Troutfield
Duda, Where’s My Car?
McClellan and Wife
If Maholmies Call
Sly and the Family Chone
There’s a Lahair in My Soup
Citizen Cain
LaRoche Trap
Headley over Heals
A Streetcar Named Cuddyer
Cudd’yer Mak’er
You Don’t Mess With The Johan
Sippin on Gin Andrus
Ruf and Ready
Pocket Full of Posey
Way over Yonder
For What It’s Werth
Ben Revere’s Ride
Latos Intolerant
Morales in Wonderland
Everything is Beachy
I Fontenot What Love Is
To Kill a Marlon Byrd
Lemon Harang Pie
The Beckett List
Two Wrongs Don’t Make a Wainwright
Joe Buck Yourself
Dr. Andrews’ Laboratory
Porcello with Mushrooms
The Vogelsong Remains the Same
Schilling in the Name of
Fiers All of Your Guns at Once
The Human Cespedes
Quantum of Solano
Tastes Like Ichiros
The Seven Year Ichiro
Pictures of Lily
Trout Ticklers
Clean Cole Solution
Cano Soup For You
Furcal Me Maybe
Saving BJ Ryan
Trumbo the Clown
Machado About Nothing
The Constant Brett Gardner
Black Sabathia
On Tabata World
High Ankiel Sprain
Tulo Windows, Tulo Walls
Maybin I’m Amazed
Definitely Maybin
Nine Inge Nails
The Big Bang Theriot
Shady Sizemore
Zack & Miri Make a Morneau
The Humber Games
Me and Casey McGehee
Fontenot Youth
Keep Johans to Yo’self
Mad About Abreu
LaHair Club for Men
Down With The Kipnis
Sherlock Gomes
WOBA is Me
Don’t Ask Dotel
The Dotel California
Mayberry Fields Forever
Hu Are Yu?
The Reverse Cowgill
Mayberry Fields Forever
Mayberry Jam
He’s Just Not That Shin Soo Choo
Morneau After Pill
The Duda Abides
Friendly Fiers
Stop! Hammeltime
Ethier Said Than Dunn
PapelBon Iver
Carry On My Heyward Dunn
Walks With Four Balls
B. Inge Drinking
Larry, Moe, and Buehrle
The Cody Asche Maru
I’m Bringing Sexson Back
Kershawshank Redemption
Eaton Disorder
Garko Polo
Touched by an Angel Pagan
Laird of the Rings
TP for my Buchholz
Puigs in a Blanket
Operation Trumbo Drop
Yoenis Envy
Grand Theft Votto
The Motte In God’s Eye
Borbón Rocks
The Valdespin Zone
The Kempire Strikes Back
Old Dirty Bastardo
Inglorious Bastardos
Coughlin Corner
Charleston-Soo Choo
Choo Talkin’ To Me?
You Kill Us, Kevin
Sipping on Gin & Youk
The Good, The Bad, and the Utley
The Devil Wears Prado
I’m Aoki, You’re Aoki
Get Your Mota Running
Joe West, Young Man
Lavarnway & Shirley
My Bobby Valentine
Testosteraun Braun
We Will Rauch You
Kershawshank Redemption
Tacoby Bellsbury
Smoak on the Wieters
Stubb Hub
Blame It On Rios
Super Upton Brothers
Openly Bay
Men Behaving Bradley
Marcum Eight, Dude
Jews for Jesus Montero
Designated Quitters
You Don’t Bring Me Fowlers (Anymore)
Your Own Personal DeJesus
Sweet, Sweet Marmolaid


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